A day like any other.

Adrian de León
3 min readJun 19, 2022

In a modern society that appears to become more fractured and more like a forced assemblage of atomised individuals, there remains a stubborn custom to celebrate certain events or individuals on a nationwide scale. Many of these (Christmas, Easter) are the remaining remnants of a pagan or Judeo-Christian heritage that has retracted in all other facets of life. Then, we have those that shove individual roles under the limelight. Set on specific dates in our Gregorian calendar, Mother’s or Father’s day is a chance to celebrate the importance of the role of an adult in one’s life. It is promoted and culturally enforced by a society and a consumer system that holds no regards for what kind of role this adult played in your life.

As the day approaches, the nature of the advertising begins to shift, slowly but undeniably from the standard realm of self-loathing and feelings of inappropriateness to a paradigm of macho, patriarchal celebration. Brands and companies gain prime advertising spots for products that in any other time reside in the backwaters of the consumer consciousness. Shaving creams, alcohol, or trips to the golf club become the attainment of filial recognition, a benchmark of male attainment. There is no room for ambiguity in gender expression. But that is a whole other essay.

Most pertinently, there is no room for the ambiguity in the significance of this day. There is no leeway to leave breathing room for those whose relationships have been, or are, complicated — if one wants to remain polite. In society’s unrelenting dedication to celebrate the fatherly role (whatever this means), there exists a common amnesic societal consciousness. We forget, for just one day, that despite the unquestionable evidence of human and evolutionary progression, we are still unable to determine what the role of a father should be. Or more importantly, we are unwilling to acknowledge this failure. Instead, we, as a society, promote a singular representation of the father figure.

Not only is this singular representation pegged by macho-patriarchal cultural signifies such as sport, alcohol, or BBQing, but it also a singular representation of what all father’s accomplish. For one day a year the walls of an elitist club are erected, with those inside glowing from the rays of a healthy father-to-offspring relationship. Individuals glowing from the benefits of a dedicated, loving, and accountable patriarch. On the other side of this wall, in the threatening and dense forests of the unwanted, resides those adults whose…